What I Learned from a Bag of Pretzels

As you might have guessed from the picture, this is a post about peanut butter pretzels. Yes, I’m digging deep to keep this blog updated and offer you some sane, non-diet, intuitive eating insight at least on a weekly basis. Which leads me to write today’s post about, yes, peanut butter pretzels.

I used to salivate just looking at these puffed pretzels sprinkled with salt and filled with one of my favorite foods – peanut butter. I don’t buy the pretzels all that often because I’m not a big salty-snack snacker. I tend to gravitate towards sweet things – fruit, biscotti, or a buttery Madeleine cookie. But, my tastes change on occasion and sometimes I want salty.

That was certainly the case during the peanut butter scare a number of months ago, when all I seemed to want was salty peanut butter filled pretzels from Trader Joe’s. Not being able to eat them (because of the PB scare) made them even more enticing to me, so once I felt they were safe I bought a bag. Not long after I dipped my hand into the bag of what some would call a “very dangerous” snack (more on that later), I got very sick of the pretzels and haven’t been able to enjoy them since.

How did I tire of such a delightful snack so quickly? Here’s how it happened. It was Sunday afternoon, and a few hours after a delicious breakfast with Jeremy, I left home to meet my mom and sister for a bit of shopping. Given that I’d had a late breakfast, I wasn’t hungry for lunch, but I knew if I didn’t eat anything until dinner I’d be famished and cranky, possibly with a headache. So I packed a large Ziploc bag full of the pretzels, and put it in my purse along with a string cheese in case I got hungry on the road. Which I did.

As you can imagine, all I had to eat was my string cheese and PB pretzels. I enjoyed probably about the first 20 or so pretzels, but mid-way through the bag, I noticed that I was forcing myself to eat them, simply to alleviate growing hunger pangs.

I discovered on that afternoon that, delicious as they are, pretzels of any kind do not a meal make.

Fast forward about a month or so. I was at work late one night last week, fully immersed in a research project. I was growing very hungry for dinner, but I didn’t want to leave the office because I was not sure if I’d be able to re-enter the zone of productivity I was in at that moment, hunger pangs and all. The only snack I had with me was, you guessed it – that same bag of peanut butter pretzels I’d longed for during the PB scare…..yes, that one bag of pretzels had been sitting on my desk at work for weeks, untouched after opening it to get my through my afternoon shopping excursion with Mom and Big Sis.

Once again, I forced myself to eat the pretzels simply to ward off a headache and growing hunger pangs. I guess they sort of did the trick, but I didn’t enjoy one of them, and they kind of ruined my late dinner once I finally got home. As I sat at my computer, plowing through research, I begrudgingly ate one pretzel at a time, not enjoying the experience one bit.

When I got home from work that night – the remaining PB pretzels in hand – Jeremy looked at them and his eyes grew large, filled with that warm-fuzzy look you get when thinking about your mom’s jelly toast that no one made quite as well as she did (or whatever food it is that “does” it for you).

Just days later, when my parents were at our place to help us move furniture, we were literally walking out the door to dinner, and my mom spotted the pretzels. “Can I have just a few?” she asked with the look of a child caught awake way past her bedtime. “Of course!” I said, “Help yourself.” She and Jeremy then commiserated about how you can’t ever eat just one of those pretzels. “They’re addictive, and very dangerous,” Jeremy said. “I can’t buy them or I’ll eat them all in one sitting,” said my mom. “I know! I asked Maggie to keep them out of the house or I’d eat the entire bag.”

Well, I’ve got news for my hubbie, my mom….and you. The pretzels lose their allure (or “danger”) when you give yourself unconditional permission to eat them. Without judgement. Or shame. Or a slap on the wrist. But be careful – if you’re like me and make your previously mouth watering snack into a makeshift meal on a shopping spree, you may never want to eat it again.

Intuitive Eating -- For Real

Two Sunday mornings ago, all I wanted for breakfast was berries – strawberries, blackberries and blueberries, ideally with yogurt and granola, and a buttery croissant on the side.

We were all out of fruit at home, and our favorite dive diner has delicious eggs, but yogurt parfait isn’t on the menu. As we laid in bed thinking of where to go, we decided on Coral Tree Café. There’s one not too far from our place, and actually we’d never been there together for breakfast.

On our way there, windows open, the air so perfect it hugged every finger floating out the window, we noticed that Cheesecake Factory was serving breakfast! This caught our attention because CF has a big patio and the day was just so yummy that we wanted to take it all in by eating outside. So right then and there our journey to Coral Tree derailed.

Big mistake. Good weather aside, we should have stuck to our original plan. Sorry, Cheesecake Factory, we've enjoyed many delicious dinners at your restaurants, but your breakfast was awful. I’m not sure how you can make eggs so tasteless, and when I asked if I could get strawberries instead of bacon with my eggs, the waitress said, “We don’t have any fruit.” Seriously? Seriously. No fruit for Sunday brunch. I could write a very long post about how disgusting our breakfast was, but I’ll spare you. All I’ll say is that sitting on the patio in beautiful southern California weather didn’t make up for the pathetic breakfast we begrudgingly made our way through.

I share this story with you because I want you to know that every meal isn’t going to be perfect. Some meals may be so dissatisfying that you stop eating them with hunger pangs still in your belly. Other meals will be so disappointing that you’ll want to stop mid-way through, but you won’t because you’re hungry and there’s food in front of you, and you have to get to Costco, get the kids fed and bathed, finish a PPT and put the next meal on the table. So you eat it.

And if you’re like me two weekends ago, it may very well ruin your entire morning. In fact, my mood didn’t turn around until about 3 in the afternoon…….when I got home from the store with a palette of strawberries, a container of blackberries, my favorite yogurt and a new box of granola. Guess what I ate for breakfast every day last week?

So, just remember that even a “seasoned” intuitive eater like myself sometimes has gross food. And sometimes it even ruins my day. But, it’s all a part of this journey. Every meal is a learning experience. You’ll notice that my disappointing meal at CF did not lead me into a binge-fest (though it did lead to a week’s worth of yogurt parfaits for breakfast, and I enjoyed every bite!).

One other little nugget for all those nay-sayers out there who say, “Intuitive eating? Doesn’t that mean you can eat anything you want? All I’d ever eat is donuts and cheeseburgers!” Guess what, sometimes all you’ll want is fresh fruit.

Intuitive Eating Audio: Must Listen!

If you're looking for yet another tool to help you break free from the diet mentality, I strongly urge you to buy the recently-released Intuitive Eating audio CDs. If you've already read Intuitive Eating in print, don't think this is the same thing. It's not. I think it's best used as a companion to the book.

As I said in my review of the CDs on amazon, having worked with people struggling to break free from the diet mentality (and having done so myself many years ago), I can honestly say this CD-set is a must-have! I recommend Intuitive Eating (print edition) to people regularly and now I recommend this as well. Elyse and Evelyn are on the top of their game in these CDs. They both share so much wisdom, passion and clarity about food and body image -- you can't help but to feel at peace -- and energized -- just listening to the CDs. Their philosophy just makes so much sense, and it works.

If you're looking to break free from the diet mentality, and make peace with food and with yourself, listen to this CD set and practice the exercises. You won't be disappointed.